I am hoping this blog gives me the outlet I need for so many of the mixed emotions I currently have.
Like everyone else in this world I have my good days and my bad days. The past two days have been a real bear. I find myself asking, "What is all this for?" "Is this all there is?" "Can I just go home to be with God now?" "Will I be able to handle another 20 or 30 years of this thing we call life?" What is God's plan for my life? Have I done all that I am supposed to have done?" "Does God have something else in mind for me?" "Can God just please let me know what he wants me to do and not have it include cancer?"
Yesterday I told someone that I was tired and wanted out. They told me, "To give up was trying to take the easy way out." "Yes!" I shouted. "That's exactly what I want." I'm tired of hard. I could really get used to the idea of easy!
